Wilton House, Salisbury

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In fair Verona, where we lay our scene…

or ... Salisbury ... Our location this week is in the stunning grounds of Wilton House, where apparently once upon a time William Shakespeare, as friend of the Earl of Pembrokeshire, brought a touring production of Romeo & Juliet. And here the players are again.

We’re on the green flank of Wilton House, on the cusp of the stately home’s gardens. There’s an exquisite pavilion bridge over a trickling brook and an intriguing water fountain behind us. Cornflowers are everywhere and clusters of mushrooms, some of which may or may not be magic, we haven’t had the chance to try, are everywhere. Our green room is inside the house itself, and you have to walk past grimacing relatives of the Earl of Pembrokeshire to get there. Paintings of them, that is. Not the actual grimacing relatives. That would be strange, even for traveling players of our queer ilk.

The first show could be described as our introduction to amphibian performance – we’re practically inhaling the pouring rain as we bray our lines. We ask the audience whether they want us to continue or return for a summery second half and they opt, nay, roar that we continue. So we do. Incredible support. Wilton, I am reminded, is a military town. I hope we still gave them a good show — I feel like we could have been awful and they still would have been beaming from beneath their anoraks. It was a quick show, I’ll just say that.

Hot chili tequila and Mexican food to warm the cockles afterwards. A deserved treat. Mercutio’s white shoes have taken a battering, I break my Paris belt, probably by milking my death scene (but you must embiggen your role as best you can, as Stanislavski or Homer Simpson said, I forget which). We bait a group of sponsors from a pensions company one night, who are oddly cordoned off from the regular paying public. As a group, I don’t think we’re fond of hierarchy.

Afterwards, they politely decline our offers to join them for their fancy feast. But we had to try. We’re actors!

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